On the Road with the Bitch

Cars. Men talk about them, work on them, read about them, buy bits for them and clean them. And if they're not doing any of these, they're usually driving them. I can't understand this fascination for inanimate objects (though maybe it explains why they also like Kim Wilde).

Men always assume that women are all lousy drivers. here is your opportunity to hit back at them with some of my bitch hand signals. After all, indicators are all very well but sometimes you just need one finger to really get your point across.

"So what if I cut you up?"

"My car's more expensive than yours so I have automatic right of way."

"It WAS your parking space..."

Get your shopping trolley out from under my car."

I don't give way to ugly men."

"I barely dented you."

I can practice my emergency stop any time I like..."

"I don't care if you ARE an ambulance - I've got private health insurance so I don't have to let you overtake me."